Hours 391 – 440

Well, so much for the “daily” blog.  Truth is, I’ve been doing so much art and poetry, plus dropping my daughter at college, that I’ve neglected to write. Good news, I’m still honestly keeping track of the hours.

For anyone who is just now dipping into this blog, a brief explanation about the hours: I’ve done a good bit of commission work (mainly portraiture) and been a writer for many moons. Worked on a lot of shows to support my family, but that didn’t necessarily feed me creatively (all love to those I’ve worked for btw – and please don’t take it personally – I realize I have a very specific creative vision!)

So, long story short, I quit my job as a producer on a reality show, started freelancing as a writer, but mainly have thrown myself into this project. Which project, you might ask? Well, based on Gladwell’s idea that it takes 10,000 hours to master something, I wanted to master “play.” Play for me is poetry and visual art. My interest in art is really varied: drawing, painting, collage, mixed media, illustration, abstraction, and on and on.

Anyway, bottom line, after doing things for other people all these years, I have decided to do something for me. I’m trying to master this art of play and see where it lands me. I figure at the rate I’m going it with take around 4 years.

And this blog, as well as my Tumblr, is an accounting of that journey. I’m committed to producing at least 2 new pieces every day. It’s been, well… life changing so far.

Back to now. I suppose the poem that best reflects how I’ve been feeling lately is this one:

In the whirl of it all
Deadlines and essays
Cross country visits
Shopping for brightly colored linens
Clothes that will send just the right message

It’s easy to forget
You’re about ready to sail from me
The safest of harbors

And then…
It’s time.

I eagerly give you one good push
Because, after all, this is my job
To fashion you in such a way that
you will one day leave

And then…
You’re off.

You don’t look back
You shouldn’t, is what I think

And yet…
You’re fading into the distance.

As I watch you sail away
Cutting through your sea of gems
So strong, so lovely, so grown up

I can’t help but..
Weep.

-Kim Beyer-Johnson

So, I guess that pretty much tell everyone what my state of mind is. I’ve been sublimating my sadness into my work. I’m also trying to push myself. I committed to a shadow series yesterday by announcing it on Tumblr. Here’s my first and second installments”

IMG_2032

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I also want to get more into painting and have decided to combine my twig and ink series into abstract painting.  An example…

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Finally, our sermon at church was all about pursuing your dream, which prompted this poem…

I’m sorry if my dream offends you
Irritates or infuriates you
I’m sorry if it compels you to remind me of all the ways
It is surely impossible
Will lead to certain poverty
Invites danger and all kind of calamity
I realize you don’t understand
The rhyme or reason for my dreaming
I’m not sure I do either
At least the straight lines and logic of it
Just the hope and heart of it
But this I do know:
In the waking
The living
The sleeping
The breathing in and out
I will continue
To dream my destiny
Into being
So please stand back
As off I go

– Kim Beyer-Johnson

And finally, per what I talked about earlier, a poem:

I’m sorry if my dream offends you
Irritates or infuriates you
I’m sorry if it compels you to remind me of all the ways
It is surely impossible
Will lead to certain poverty
Invites danger and all kind of calamity
I realize you don’t understand
The rhyme or reason for my dreaming
I’m not sure I do either
At least the straight lines and logic of it
Just the hope and heart of it
But this I do know:
In the waking
The living
The sleeping
The breathing in and out
I will continue
To dream my destiny
Into being
So please stand back
As off I go

– Kim Beyer-Johnson

There’s been much more, but I want to get back to creating.

Moving forward. Onward!

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